IP Fictionarium

Minia

2012-01-18T22:12:00.000-08:00

Minia - a miniature mania or a mania over miniatures.

Rightmare

2012-01-02T17:42:00.001-08:00

Rightmare - a dream in which the Republicans attain their ultimate goal of unilateral power and make it illegal to be poor or not white.
"Man, I had the worst rightmare last night, I was getting busy with my girl and the police broke in and gave me a ticket for 'non-approved sexual position', it was just the inverted monkey catcher, what the hell?"

Note, I have no idea if there is a sexual position called the inverted monkey catcher but I'm pretty sure that there should be.

Plustered

2011-12-06T21:05:00.001-08:00

Plustered - when you meet someone you've previously only known via Google+ and you are, momentarily, speechless.
"Got totally plustered when I ran into @mathowie outside the LBS."

Grumpon

2011-11-21T14:44:00.001-08:00

Grumpon - a new social money saving website for grumpy people.
"Dude, did you see the deal for cranky pants on Grumpon? I'm stocking up!"

Of course also gives rise to many other derivatives:
Slumpon - deals for people with bad posture.
Pumpon - deals for fans of inflatable products (could include a sexy corner store too).
Dumpon - deals for toilet obsessed people or for people that like those grab bag deals of shit they couldn't sell.
Humpon - deals for people seeking sexual gratification.
Chumpon - "deals" for people who are bad at deals and always spend more than they need to.
Thumpon - deals for people that enjoy thumping on other people about what a great deal they got.
Lumpon - deals for cancer patients.
Sumpon - deals for people like my buddy who live in the hills and have constant water seepage issues.

And yeah, I could almost certainly just keep going on and on.

Tittally

2011-11-21T14:43:00.001-08:00

Tittally - totally tits.
"Meghan McCain may be nuts but she's also tittally awesome."

Yes, yes I did invent a word to describe Meghan McCain, what of it?

Babeitized

2011-11-21T14:40:00.001-08:00

Babeitized - when one is first described as a hottie is when one has been Babeitized.
"She didn't get babeitized until later in life when she ditched the glasses and started playing sports more."

Taura

2011-11-21T14:39:00.001-08:00

Taura - a tour of auras (no, I'm not really sure what it means either).
"She showed me her crystals and then took me on a taura around the cemetery."

Twatts

2011-11-21T14:33:00.001-08:00

Twatts - the measurement unit of being a twat, ie. jerkface, asshat, prick, etc.
"He was working hard to pump out a lot of twatts last night after he got insulted."

Also, twattage - your overall twatts rating.

Scaroling

2011-11-21T14:31:00.001-08:00

Scaroling - caroling that results in scaring people by bad singing.
"We tried to sing Silent Night but our scaroling was so bad we should have just hummed it instead."

Also, of course,
Scarroling - caroling so bad that it actually leaves scars, probably mental or emotional but really, really bad singing could cause physical harm.

Innact

2011-11-21T14:29:00.001-08:00

Innact - enacting an inn.
"By these proclamations, I hereby innact this new bed & breakfast! Long may it serve fresh scones and strong coffee!"

Helpatitis

2011-11-21T14:28:00.001-08:00

Helpatitis - a terminal case of helping others.
"His helpatitis is super easy to exploit, he wants to help soooo much."

Whorrendous

2011-11-21T14:23:00.003-08:00

Whorrendous - a really bad whore.
"She was whorrendous, she didn't know how to put on a rubber, she didn't know how to use the twist ties and she didn't cut off my air flow long enough. Just whorrendous, man!"

Fatapult

2011-11-21T14:23:00.001-08:00

Fatapult - a catapult made specifically to throw fat people.
"Man, you'd need a huge fatapult to launch that dude."

Deskape

2011-11-21T14:22:00.001-08:00

Deskape - escape from one's desk.
"I didn't want to deliver the bad report upstairs but I really needed a little deskape and it was the first opp that came up."

Disttractive

2011-11-21T14:20:00.001-08:00

Disstractive - when an attractive person uglies themselves up on purpose so they are less of distraction because they are so attractive.
"She didn't want to call attention to herself so she made her as disstractive as possible."

Funfold

2011-10-24T08:49:00.000-07:00

Funfold - when fun unfolds in front of you, like an amusement park ride or a bike ride through an enchanted wood. "The day totally funfolded for us perfectly, from the sun through the trees up on the mountain to the sun setting magnificently over the Boardwalk. Epic and awesome day!"

Douchebank

2011-10-18T09:38:00.001-07:00

Douchebank - a douche-y bank, duh. "BofA is the biggest douchebank around right now with their bullshit debit card charge."

Limpotent

2011-10-17T09:17:00.000-07:00

Limpotent - limp and impotent, yeah its redundant but so's your mom. "The mind was willing but the flesh had been beaten into submission by the anvil that is her pubic bone, leaving me limpotent but with a rather dirty smile perma set into my face."

Dickocrite

2011-10-17T09:15:00.000-07:00

Dickocrite - hypocritical dick, see Beck, Glenn. "That guy is such a total dickocrite, last year he trumpeted the Tea Party's 'righteous anger' and now he calls the occupiers 'stinky socialist hippies'."

Borjury

2011-09-28T13:56:00.000-07:00

Borjury (bore-jury) - committing perjury out of boredom. "Man, this trial's never gonna end, I'm gonna commit borjury and go relax in a jail cell for a bit."

Chacne

2011-09-28T13:47:00.000-07:00

Chacne (chack-knee) - chance acne. In use, "I was totally looking forward to my date tonight but got hit with some chacne and now I'm not going anywhere."

Choadie

2011-09-22T09:42:00.000-07:00

Choadie - a road riding bicyclist who dresses like a total choad.

A choad, for them's that aren't knowing, is the strip of skin between your scrotum and anus. Some folks also call it a taint, as in 'taint this and 'taint that. But I've also known it as the choad which is lots of fun to say.

Imbecillin

2011-08-22T20:25:00.000-07:00

Imbecillin - an inoculation against being a fucking idiot.

Bummingbird

2011-08-19T10:27:00.002-07:00

Bummingbird - a pessimistic hummingbird.

Rolish

2011-08-19T10:27:00.000-07:00

Rolish - a role that is relished.

Martality

2011-08-19T10:26:00.004-07:00

Martality - death by marriage.

Flautos

2011-08-19T10:26:00.002-07:00

Flautos - flautas made out of or to look like cars.

Wocha

2011-08-19T10:26:00.000-07:00

Wocha - (pronounced Woe-ka, like mocha with a W) a first thing out of bed choco coffee is a wocha.

Conduchive

2011-08-19T10:25:00.002-07:00

Conduchive - conducive to being a douche.

Coffeenated

2011-08-19T10:25:00.000-07:00

Coffeenated - adding coffee to anything.

Feeked

2011-08-19T10:24:00.001-07:00

Feeked - getting fucked by fee.

Fondude

2011-07-20T23:35:00.001-07:00

Fondude - That guy on the floor who got a fondue pot for Christmas during freshman year of college? Yeah, he was the fondude.

NWoTD - Amkneesia

2011-05-25T13:16:00.001-07:00

Amkneesia - when you forget that you've got a bad knee or knees you are suffering from amkneesia.

NWoTD - Trumpathy

2011-05-09T13:54:00.001-07:00

Trumpathy - sympathy for Donald Trump (curable via medication and/or lobotomy).

NWoTD - Trampathy

2011-05-09T13:53:00.001-07:00

Trampathy - sympathy or empathy for tramps (either the sexually promiscuous kind or the ones asking for spare change at intersections)

NWoTD - Opposuite

2011-05-09T13:52:00.005-07:00

Opposuite - a suite on the opposite side of the hallway or a "mirror image" suite

NWoTD - Explanatino

2011-05-09T13:52:00.003-07:00

Explanatino - a latino who explains himself (rare)

NWoTD - Ofiend

2011-05-09T13:52:00.001-07:00

Ofiend - a regular and often fiend

NWoTD - Ashean

2011-05-09T13:51:00.004-07:00

Ashean - ocean filled with ash

NWoTD - Monochromous

2011-05-09T13:51:00.002-07:00

Monochromous - a monotonous one-sided "conversation"

NWoTD - Bitchycle

2011-05-09T13:51:00.000-07:00

Bitchycle - someone who keeps complaining even after getting on their bike

NWoTD - Internlude

2011-05-09T13:50:00.003-07:00

Internlude - take a break from work to do an internship

NWoTD - Whorror

2011-05-09T13:50:00.001-07:00

Whorror - a horrifying prostitute

NWoTD - Rueben

2011-05-09T13:49:00.004-07:00

Rueben - a sandwich you regret eating

NWoTD - Urpa

2011-05-09T13:49:00.002-07:00

Urpa - urban sherpa

NWoTD - Embarrify

2011-05-09T13:49:00.000-07:00

Embarrify - the act of embarrassing someone is embarrifying them

NWoTD - Mewt

2011-05-09T13:48:00.002-07:00

Mewt - a cat that won't meow

NWoTD - Blaizzez faire

2011-05-09T13:48:00.000-07:00

Blaizzez faire - someone who doesn't care where they smoke (pot)

NWoTD - Spotaneously

2011-03-03T11:42:00.005-08:00

Spotaneously - spontaneously on a spot.

NWoTD - Purade

2011-03-03T11:42:00.003-08:00

Purade - a parade of only the pure (think white supremacist mentality).

NWoTD - Schlockularity

2011-03-03T11:42:00.001-08:00

Schlockularity - taking pleasure in the purchase of plastic crap is schlockularity

NWoTD - Blockularity

2011-03-03T11:41:00.005-08:00

Blockularity - taking great pleasure in cock blocking someone results in blockularity

NWoTD - Beautility

2011-03-03T11:41:00.003-08:00

Beautility - the beauty of something that's really useful.

NWoTD - Pitio

2011-03-03T11:41:00.001-08:00

Pitio - an outdoor space for pity

NWoTD - Seethan

2011-03-03T11:40:00.003-08:00

Seethan - an angry (or seething) heathen

NWoTD - Staplier

2011-03-03T11:40:00.001-08:00

Staplier - supplier of staples

NWoTD - Pastellar

2011-03-03T11:39:00.003-08:00

Pastellar - really, really nice pastel colors

NWoTD - Hatino

2011-03-03T11:39:00.001-08:00

Hatino - a hateful latino

NWoTD - Virtuaous

2011-01-20T09:02:00.005-08:00

Virtuaous - virtually virtuous, someone who plays nicely only but is a jerk in real life (yeah, I know its usually the other way around)

NWoTD - Oprahtality

2011-01-20T09:02:00.003-08:00

Oprahtality - hospitality, Oprah style with lots of Oooooooooo's and waving of the arms and looking under the chairs and such. Here's how it would go if one of Oprah's favorite things was bees and yes, looking at this makes me laugh out loud every single time!

NWoTD - Lousen

2011-01-20T09:02:00.001-08:00

Lousen - loosening up a louse

NWoTD - Cumpetent

2011-01-20T09:01:00.003-08:00

Cumpetent - able to ejaculate

NWoTD - Trystery

2011-01-20T09:01:00.001-08:00

Trystery - mystery tryst (think Mark Sanford disappearing out of the country to go sleep with his South American mistress)

NWoTD - Hispital

2011-01-20T09:00:00.006-08:00

Hispital - hospital for Hispanics

NWoTD - Denigh

2011-01-20T09:00:00.004-08:00

Denigh - not imminent

NWoTD - Vicktimized

2011-01-20T09:00:00.002-08:00

Vicktimized - anyone preyed upon by Michael Vick

NWoTD - Champanzee

2011-01-20T09:00:00.000-08:00

Champanzee - the best chimpanzee ever

NWoTD - FUDoric

2011-01-20T08:59:00.003-08:00

FUDoric - rhetoric designed to elicit FUD (fear, uncertainty and doubt)

NWoTD - FUDing

2011-01-20T08:59:00.001-08:00

FUDing - intentionally sowing fear, uncertainty and doubt (see Palin, Sarah for relevant examples of FUDing)

NWoTD - Properganda

2011-01-20T08:58:00.001-08:00

Properganda - proper propaganda

NWoTD - Brotential

2010-10-26T13:25:00.001-07:00

Brotential - potential to be a good friend (like a brother).

NWoTD - Reazen

2010-10-26T11:53:00.001-07:00

Reazen - calmed by reason (zen reasoning).

NWoTD - Boyant

2010-10-26T11:52:00.005-07:00

Boyant - elated by boys.

NWoTD - Plainasdayopia

2010-10-26T11:52:00.003-07:00

Plainasdayopia - when you are looking for something only to realize its right there in front of you.

NWoTD - Entitlista

2010-10-26T11:52:00.001-07:00

Entitlista - someone on welfare who decries others on welfare (see Party, Tea).

NWoTD - Pissibly

2010-10-26T11:51:00.002-07:00

Pissibly - pissily possible, someone who will do something for you but will grief you with a poor attitude the whole time (props to Evan Ashenhurst).

NWoTD - Fogure

2010-10-26T11:51:00.000-07:00

Fogure - figurative fog or a figure in the fog, maybe even one that turns out to be nothing.

NWoTD - Protential

2010-10-26T11:42:00.001-07:00

Protential - potential protein, that is, baby fish before they are big enough to eat, soybeans too small to harvest, etc. Also possibly means potential to go pro.

NWoTD - Harouse

2010-10-26T11:41:00.003-07:00

Harouse - attempt to arouse by harrassment. Appears to be SOP at local high schools.

NWoTD - Weepon

2010-10-26T11:41:00.001-07:00

Weepon - a weapon that forces the target to break down crying.

NwoTD - Twuth

2010-09-27T15:04:00.001-07:00

Twuth - Twitter truth, something you cannot handle.

NWoTD - Tutirials

2010-09-27T15:03:00.005-07:00

Tutirials - tired tutorial or possibly a tutorial delivered by a tired out presenter.

NWoTD - Tempty

2010-09-27T15:03:00.003-07:00

Tempty - empty temptation.

NWoTD - Powervty

2010-09-27T15:03:00.001-07:00

Powervty - poor in power.

NWoTD - Cumpaign

2010-09-27T15:02:00.003-07:00

Cumpaign - a campaign of sexual conquest.

NWoTD - Constituition

2010-09-27T15:02:00.001-07:00

Constituition - paying your way through college through trying employment (constitution) or using the Constitution to pay for tuition.

NWoTD - Campire

2010-09-27T15:01:00.000-07:00

Campire - campfire for vampires.

NWoTD - Attirude

2010-09-27T14:52:00.000-07:00

Attirude - rude attitude.

NWoTD - Adgitate

2010-09-27T14:51:00.001-07:00

Adgitate - agitated by advertising.

NWoTD - Stopics

2010-09-27T14:49:00.001-07:00

Stopics - topics that kill conversations.

NWoTD - Pricknic

2010-09-27T14:48:00.004-07:00

Pricknic - a picnic for jerks.

NWoTD - Scruel

2010-09-27T14:48:00.003-07:00

Scruel - a cruel school.

NWoTD - Thawt

2010-09-27T14:48:00.001-07:00

Thawt - thinking that thaws one out.

NWoTD - Almoast

2010-09-27T14:47:00.002-07:00

Almoast - bread that is almost toast.

NWoTD - Scrone

2010-09-27T14:47:00.001-07:00

Scrone - pastry for a mean old lady.

NWoTD - Oddvice

2010-09-27T14:46:00.002-07:00

Oddvice - strange or odd advice.

NWoTD - Blottery

2010-09-27T14:46:00.001-07:00

Blottery - partying so hard after winning the lottery that you don't remember
winning it.

NWoTD - Togurt

2010-09-27T14:45:00.002-07:00

Togurt - the body cheese generated by a couple of hard partying days in a toga (don't pretend you haven't done the Roman-style lost weekend of partying).

NWoTD - Cumputer

2010-09-27T14:45:00.001-07:00

Cumputer - computer used solely for surfing porn.

NWoTD - Brokeh

2010-09-27T14:44:00.004-07:00

Brokeh - badly done bokeh photography.