Whosband

Whosband - when you can't ever seem to remember that that hot friend of yours is married.

"After the third round I found myself not even giving a slight damn that he's a whosband, I was gonna get some!"

Namasturbation

Namasturbation - masturbating in or to yoga attire.

"I was trying to release my chakras but ended up just getting into some deeply spiritual namasturbation."

Brotein

Brotein - getting a little extra shot of protein by blowing your buddy and swallowing.

Why yes, yes I do sometimes disgust my own self.

Snarkour

Snarkour - using one's mental agility and wit to snark, demean and otherwise elicit humor from online comments.

"We gathered on SFGate's Daily Dish pages for another exciting snarkour workout amongst the celebrity gossip news and scandals."

Cuberty

Cuberty - coming of age while playing Minecrack ,ahem, I meant Minecraft. Or the process of going from a pwned noob to becoming a Redstone Master (or whatever the term is for a kid who spends 99% of his waking brain power on Minecraft).

"His voice didn't change when he hit cuberty but his builds definitely matured from the TNT villages to actual constructions."

Leavitate

Leavitate - floating away.

"She asked me to stay but I sort of leavitated away when she went off to chat with someone else."

Convulsizing

Convulsizing - getting your exercise from convulsions. 

"Convulsizing must be a great workout because I'm always super-sweaty and exhausted afterwards."

Obtese

Obtese - an obese obtuse person. Perhaps about their own weight.

"I think most of his fat is between his ears, that dude is totally obtese."

Swomen

Swomen - swimming in women, like a boss!

"I don't get it, he's ugly and poor, how does he always end up going swomen every weekend?"

Vegatarrorist

Vegetarrorist - vegetarian terrorist, the vegetarian who has to tell you about the slaughter process while you're about to tuck into a burger. Can also be spelled vegeterrorist.

"I enjoyed pissing off that vegetarrorist by macking on that sloppy Double-Double, up until the instant they sprayed me with pepper spray."

Plastician

Plastician - plastic technician.

"I was flummoxed but the tech had been working on a side project and used some of his plastician expertise to get the case to seal up."

GOPe

GOPe - Grand Old Party dope. Here's the thing, if you're not an old, white, fat man then the Republican party just wants your money and your vote and not you. Period. No women. No black people. No asians. No nothing but old, white, fat men.

And if you vote Republican and you aren't an old, white, fat man then you are a GOPe (that's pronounced like dope but with a G in the front).

"That poor GOPe over there thinks its all about gun control when, in reality, its all about his party trying to kill off the middle class entirely and go waaaay back to a feudal society where there are serfs and landowners and the landowners can basically do whatever they want. And that moronic GOPe ain't gonna be no landowner."

Fuckon

Fuckon - a resident of the planet Fuck or someone who just doesn't give a fuck. Also see DILLIGAF.

"I was going to flip the guy off after he nearly punted me but I could clearly see he was a Fuckon and his give a fucks meter was permanently set to zero."

Browl

Browl - a brawl between brothers.

"Man, the Super Bowl is going to be a Super Browl between the Harbaughs!"

Celesticles

Celesticles - celestial testicles aka God's nards.

"And then Jesus asked if she wanted to examine his celesticles for divine inspiration but I think he was just too shy to ask for a handjob."

Stripture

Stripture - the "lost" chapters of the Bible, they were significantly less SFW than most (though some of that Old Testament is pretty gruesome).

"We spent the night reading Stripture and humping like bunnies!"

Religin

Religin - an alcoholic beverage made of fermented dingelberries and altar boy tears. "Ahh, nothing like a religin and tonic to take the edge off a rough day of saving souls and poking holes."

Rebooty call

Rebooty call - a late night call for technical support. "I was just hanging playing a Skyrim spinoff when I got the rebooty call and I was all SCORE!"

Campatible

Campatible - camping compatibility. 
"We got along great at the bar but I found out early in the trip that we just weren't very campatible."

Scrawnly

Scrawnly - a person of slight build with highly defined muscles.