Snowglobed

Snowglobed - when someone capriciously (or seemingly so) upends your life making you have to scramble to put everything back together, that is called getting snowglobed.

"My boss snowglobed me and then submitted his own resignation, hard not to take that a little personally when he went out of his way to fuck my life up on his way out the door."

Ratiowned

Ratiowned - when your tweet gets virtually no likes or retweets and a whole bunch of replies correcting your stupidity/ignorance/Bernie smear and you get owned by Twitter, you have been ratiowned.

"Dave got ratiowned again and again when he tried to smear Bernie with his garbage centrist talkings points and then he tried to assert that he was the left." (based on a true story).

Icean

Icean - an ice cold ocean.

"You can't go out in that icean without a decent wetsuit, at least a 5 mill, bro!"

Acronymonious

Acronymonious - bitterly angry about the use of acronyms.

"All I did was mentionhow much I love my new scuba gear with laser range finder on top and he was all acronymonious with me about it."

Emberrassed

Emberrassed - when you're so embarrassed that your ass is on fire from all of the butt hurt, from the root words, ember and assed.

"You'd think someone would get emberrassed after making so many flagrantly false predictions but nope, Nate Silver's still out there pretending he knows what's happening."

Delicktable

Delicktable - so delicious looking you just want to lick it, yes, this can apply to food and people. Delectable mushed with a lick.

Anuscript

Anuscript - a story about an asshole or when you pull a story out of your ass at the last minute.

"That anuscript is a walk down holes I've known lane."

Phallacy

Phallacy - a fake phallus (yes, I'm aware that's an oxymoron).

Scrumbag

Scrumbag - a dirty piece of shit rugby player.

"That scrumbag poked me in the eyes in our last match!"

Shitizen

Shitizen - a shitty citizen. 

"Doesn't it just make you happy to watch a bunch of shitizens trash their town after a bunch of athletes win (or lose!) a championship there?"

Clitteralist

Clitteralist - somebody literally made of clitorises (clitorii?). Yes, I'm aware that is both gross and not possible.

Again, not sure where my head is at with this one.

Fappiary

Fappiary - an aviary for fapping (masturbating).

"Not the kind of birds I'm used to being around while fapping but the fappiary was an unusual twist, that's for sure."

Glaccident

Glaccident - a glass accident, an all too familiar event among butter fingered pot smokers.

"Dooood, I borrowed your Graphix and had a glaccident with it, I get paid next week and will replace it then, sorry, brah."

Ignoramuse

Ignoramuse - when someone is so impenetrably stupid that their ignorance is amusing. Or someone who's ignorance is so impenetrable that they are used as a muse for someone else to riff off of (think Rep. Steve King's mind boggling gall to declare Ebola airborne and that the doctors treating Ebola patients aren't to be believed).

Shockingly idiotic comments that other shockingly idiotic people glom onto as if they have even a shred of factual reality within them.

Fiture

Fiture - a fit future, what every body tries to start the New Year with.

"Looking forward to bright fiture with a new gym membership and a subscription to the Yoga Pants of the Month Club."

Insirance

Insirance - insurance against sirs. This was much more popular back in the days of knights and primae noctis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Droit_du_seigneur).

"He came to get her but I showed my insirance card and he had to go take the neighbor's daughter instead."

Pedestrianaise

Pedestrianaise - the sandwich topping made when a pedestrian gets creamed by a car.

Yeah, I have no idea what I'm doing this morning either.

Erectify

Erectify - to rectify with an erection, ie. fornicate your way back into good graces.

"At first she was super pissed that he was late and had gotten his eye brows shaved off by his jerk friends, but he erectified things properly before the evening got too out of hand."

Manglish

Manglish - mangled English, what most Americans seem to think is proper English where commas are extraneous and spelling is for losers and libtards... looks like "lol ur a fuking dumass".

"You argument hits a sizable obstacle when you resort to using manglish as a means to try and convince me, I can't even understand half of what you wrote."

Erigance

Erigance - Erik + arrogance. Yes, my housemate coined this on me last night. 

"Erik, your erigance is showing, confidence is sexy, being an arrogant dicknugget? Not so much."

Note: Photo may not be of an Erik or Eric but he's clearly displaying some erigance here.