21 November 2011

Grumpon

Grumpon - a new social money saving website for grumpy people.
"Dude, did you see the deal for cranky pants on Grumpon? I'm stocking up!"

Of course also gives rise to many other derivatives:
Slumpon - deals for people with bad posture.
Pumpon - deals for fans of inflatable products (could include a sexy corner store too).
Dumpon - deals for toilet obsessed people or for people that like those grab bag deals of shit they couldn't sell.
Humpon - deals for people seeking sexual gratification.
Chumpon - "deals" for people who are bad at deals and always spend more than they need to.
Thumpon - deals for people that enjoy thumping on other people about what a great deal they got.
Lumpon - deals for cancer patients.
Sumpon - deals for people like my buddy who live in the hills and have constant water seepage issues.

And yeah, I could almost certainly just keep going on and on.

Tittally

Tittally - totally tits.
"Meghan McCain may be nuts but she's also tittally awesome."

Yes, yes I did invent a word to describe Meghan McCain, what of it?

Babeitized

Babeitized - when one is first described as a hottie is when one has been Babeitized.
"She didn't get babeitized until later in life when she ditched the glasses and started playing sports more."

Taura

Taura - a tour of auras (no, I'm not really sure what it means either).
"She showed me her crystals and then took me on a taura around the cemetery."

Twatts

Twatts - the measurement unit of being a twat, ie. jerkface, asshat, prick, etc.
"He was working hard to pump out a lot of twatts last night after he got insulted."

Also, twattage - your overall twatts rating.

Scaroling

Scaroling - caroling that results in scaring people by bad singing.
"We tried to sing Silent Night but our scaroling was so bad we should have just hummed it instead."

Also, of course,
Scarroling - caroling so bad that it actually leaves scars, probably mental or emotional but really, really bad singing could cause physical harm.

Innact

Innact - enacting an inn.
"By these proclamations, I hereby innact this new bed & breakfast! Long may it serve fresh scones and strong coffee!"

Helpatitis

Helpatitis - a terminal case of helping others.
"His helpatitis is super easy to exploit, he wants to help soooo much."

Whorrendous

Whorrendous - a really bad whore.
"She was whorrendous, she didn't know how to put on a rubber, she didn't know how to use the twist ties and she didn't cut off my air flow long enough. Just whorrendous, man!"

Fatapult

Fatapult - a catapult made specifically to throw fat people.
"Man, you'd need a huge fatapult to launch that dude."

Deskape

Deskape - escape from one's desk.
"I didn't want to deliver the bad report upstairs but I really needed a little deskape and it was the first opp that came up."

Disttractive

Disstractive - when an attractive person uglies themselves up on purpose so they are less of distraction because they are so attractive.
"She didn't want to call attention to herself so she made her as disstractive as possible."